Episode 55: Tertiary Midichlorians

Since we in Boston are staring down the barrel of another blizzard, we decided to get out of the Home Office while we could to catch a movie: Kingsman: The Secret Service, the new movie based on Mark Millar’s and Dave Gibbons’s 2012 comic The Secret Service.

While Rob in particular didn’t like The Secret Service as it was being released in comic form, we took the movie as an opportunity to reread the original series as a complete work, and we talk about some plot and thematic differences between the comic and movie, as well as what worked about the movie… and what didn’t work. (Important safety tip: if Samuel L. Jackson tells you, with a lisp, that in order to save the world he needs to put an explosive chip in your neck? Call your lawyer and tell him to ask Sam for his business plan first.)

We also discuss:

• Star Wars: Darth Vader #1, written by Kieron Gillen with art by Salvatore Larroca, and:
• Southern Bastards #7, written by Jason Aaron with art by Jason Latour!

And now the usual disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape. While that might mean a looser comics podcast than you might be used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the discovery that many English foods sound like euphemisms for perverse locker room hazing (hi, Toad In The Hole!).
• The show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, if you intend to see Kingsman: The Secret Service, you should consider yourself warned.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Do you want to explain to your boss why chugging a Toad In The Hole isn’t a matter for the police? Get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:41:37 — 90.3MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 54: It Pipes Dingles

After another week of snow in Boston, we are half-insane from seeing the same four walls, but we have braved rolling blizzards, loud workmen and sporadic Internet outages to bring you a discussion about DC’s new publishing strategy!

It’s not quite a reboot, and it’s not quite an Implosion, but it seems like an attempt to step back from three years of tightly-enforced continuity, to roll back a few missteps introduced in the 2011 reboot (Hi, Starfire!), and to welcome new readers of demographics other than middle-aged white people. However, considering we are both middle-aged white people, this move means different things to each of us, so we try to hash out how we feel about the idea.

We also discuss:

• Miracleman #15, written by Alan Moore (we’ll call you “The Original Writer” once your check clears, Alan) with art by John Totleben, and:
• The Goon: Once Upon A Hard Time #1, written and drawn by Eric Powell!

And now the disclaimers:

• We record this show love to tape. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also mean that anything can happen. Like an intense discussion about scotch that has been sent into space.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, be aware that at the very least, we will be spoiling a story that was originally published in 1988 (and seriously, you should buy and read Miracleman #15).
• This show contains profane, explicit language, and is therefore not safe for work. Blame it on the Space Scotch and cabin fever if you must, but get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:41:52 — 88.3MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 53: Ghostblasters!

We here at Crisis On Infinite Midlives live in Boston, and it is the week of a large football contest (so we are told). So we decided to spend this episode talking about an organization and its members who were recently accused of malfeasance, dirty tricks in the face of their fans, and a general betrayal of the public trust.

That organization is, of course, the Ghostbusters.

This week, Ghostbusters director Paul Feig announced his intended casting for the franchise reboot, and the Internet exploded. And not in a good way. So we discuss our feelings and opinions about this reboot, how it works with our feelings toward a franchise that literally changed one of our lives, and why it is arguably the best possible solution for continuing the property. We also talk about how this announcement affected our feelings toward the other recently-publicized reboot: Marvel’s Secret Wars.

We also talk about:

• Batman #38, written by Scott Snyder with art by Greg Capullo, and:
• Quantum And Woody Must Die #1, written by James Asmus with art by Steve Lieber!

And now the legalese:

• We record this show live to tape. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like whether Barbie Princess Power’s super ability has to do with Ken’s genitals.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, assume that you will learn that Barbie Princess Power’s super ability has to do with Ken’s genitals.
• This show contains profane, explicit language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss hearing this much about Ken’s genitals? Didn’t think so. Get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:44:13 — 95.6MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 52: The Mullet Apocalypse

It’s been three months since Marvel announced the Secret Wars crossover event, and since then, speculation has been flying about what it meant for the Marvel Universe: would it be a reboot, or just an event allowing Marvel characters from all their various universes to punch on each other for a few months?

Well, Marvel’s Senior Vice President and Executive Editor Tom Brevoort and Editor-In-Chief Axel Alonso did a press conference about Secret Wars this week, and it turns out the answer is: both!

So this week, we spend a lot of time poring over audio from that press conference, first trying to figure out if this reboot was planned before or after Alonso famously denied that Marvel was planning a reboot. We also discuss whether and what we’ll miss from the Ultimate Universe, what we want to see written out of Marvel continuity, and what we think is absolutely sacrosanct. Further, when it comes to Secret Wars itself, we talk about Battleworld, what battles we want to see between characters and universes, and ultimately, whether or not we’re excited by the idea of a Crisis On Infinite Earths-style reboot of Stan and Jack’s Marvel Universe.

We also discuss:

• The Amazing Spider-Man #13, written by Dan Slott with art by Giuseppe Camuncoli, and:
• Powers #1, written by Brian Michael Bendis with art by Michael Avon Oeming!

And now, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape. While this might mean this is a looser comics podcast than you might be used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like discussions over whether we want to start a Kickstarter to fund the purchase of a Crisis On Infinite Midlives Kill-Bot.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume that we’ve ruined the end of Spider-Verse for you.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and therefore is not safe for work. Unless you want your employer finding out what body part we want to use to trigger the machines guns on our Kill-Bot, get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 2:00:54 — 110.9MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 51: Clown Merkin

Picture, if you will, a comic book about a world where old gods hide in the shadows. They have amassed monetary wealth and earthly power, and they plan to use it to force humanity to worship them again… by fomenting Armageddon on Earth, and then saving the last surviving dregs of humanity, who will worship the Old Ones while envying the dead. A world where the only one who can save us is a simple nun. Oh, yeah: and Jesus. Who rides a Harley. And carries a machine gun. And enjoys the use of stimulants and prostitutes. Oh, and I forgot: Satan’s there, too. And he and Jesus have a history. In the Sam and Diane, Ross and Rachel sense of the word.

Sound like a fun comic? Well, it actually exists, and this week, we’re excited to have as our special guests: Nick Marino and Daniel Arruda Massa, the co-creators of Action Lab’s Danger Zone imprint’s newest comic: Holy F*ck!

Nick and Daniel spent a little time with us to talk about the book, its origins, how they came to collaborate on the book, how it found a home at Action Lab, and what you can expect from this story of Jesus and Satan against the old gods (hint: there are no helicopters). We also extensively discuss the use of specialty hairpieces in the pursuit of comics work. It’s a damn fun interview.

In addition, Amanda and I talk about:

• Dan DiDio’s ongoing series of Facebook posts recapping his 13-year history at DC Comics,
• Star Wars #1, written by Jason Aaron with art by John Cassaday, and:
• Constantine #21, written by Ray Fawkes with art by Jeremy Haun!

And the obligatory disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape (although we recorded our interview with Nick and Daniel separately, and then cut it into the remainder of the show). As such, it might be a little looser than other comics podcasts you are used to, but it also means that anything can happen. Like a detailed description of Zeus’s man-nipples.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout warnings ahead of time, just assume we’re going to ruin every ending you ever cared about.
• This show contains adult, profane languange, and is therefore not safe for work. We interview guys who created a book called Holy F*ck, guys; unless you want your boss to hear a discussion about Jesus’s and Satan’s special relationship, get some headphones.

A few other things we want to point out:

Nick and Daniel did a few short comics about what Jesus has been up to between Good Friday and Holy F*ck, if you want to get a taste of the book:

• Holy F*ck Origins: 33 AD – Jesus returns to the Apostles
• Holy F*ck Origins: 506 AD – Jesus gets drunk with Merlin
• Holy F*ck Origins: 994 AD – Jesus fires Earth’s first gun
• Holy F*ck Origins: 1532 AD – God’s angry at his naughty son
• Holy F*ck Origins: 1958 AD – Lucha Libre action: Jesus vs. Satan!

The first two issues are available at Comixology, and:

While we were talking, Nick put together and sent us a drawing that is relevant to our discussion, the comic and the title of this show:

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:55:10 — 105.7MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 50: How Peggy Carter Got Her Groove Back

It was a big week for Marvel’s Cinematic Universe this week, as the first two episodes of the limited series Agent Carter debuted on Tuesday. So we spend some time talking about that episode, its themes of sexism, how its mid-40s setting is a blessing and an opportunity, and how an obscure comic from 1942 might hold some secrets about the series.

Agent Carter also featured the debut of the first teaser trailer for Marvel’s Ant-Man movie. We’ve made no secret that we’re looking far less forward to this movie now that Edgar Wright is no longer directing, so we talk about whether this trailer changes our mind at all. Short answer: watch the trailer with no audio, and see if it doesn’t look like a prison flick with Paul Rudd as a convicted child predator and Michael Douglas as his lovesick warden.

We also discuss:

• Ant-Man #1, written by Nick Spencer with art by Ramon Rosanas, and:
• The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #1, written by Ryan North with art by Erica Henderson!

And now the legalese:

• We record this show live to tape. While this might mean a looser show than you are used to from most comics podcasts, it also means that anything can happen. Like the definition of “Cream of Swede.” It’s not what you think! It’s far more disgusting!
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout warnings ahead of time, just assume that we will ruin everything you care about.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. I refer you again to the phrase “Cream of Swede.” You’re gonna want some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:42:33 — 93.7MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 49: Wookie Shoe Porn

It’s the first episode of 2015! In a week where there’s no comics news since everyone in comics is on vacation, and there were almost no new comics for exactly the same reason! Which means most comics podcasts and news sites are doing their Best Of / Worst Of lists this week… while we did ours last week. Clearly we don’t plan well.

So this week, we decided to look back to a couple of events from 2014 that we haven’t previously talked about in a lot of detail:

• The Doctor Who Christmas Special, Last Christmas, and:
• Luc Besson’s superhero-ish movie from last summer, Lucy, starring Scarlett Johansson!

And while it was a light week for comics, there were a couple of big, highly-anticipated issues. So we discuss:

• All-New Miracleman Annual #1, written by Grant Morrison and Peter Milligan, with art by Joe Quesada and Mike Allred, and:
• S.H.I.E.L.D. #1, based on the TV show Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., written by Mark Waid and drawn by Carlos Pacheco!

And now the legalese:

• We record this show live to tape. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used it, it also means that anything can happen. Like the definition of a Face Dream Herpe.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume that you will be told the villain of 1988’s Miracleman #15. 27 years is enough of a cushion.
• We use adult, profane language, so therefore this show is not safe for work. This week’s title is “Wookie Shoe Porn,” for God’s sake. We shouldn’t need to warn you to get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:56:00 — 104.4MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 48: Moffat! The 2014 Crises Awards

It is the final show of 2014: a year packed to the gills with comic books, crossover events, story arcs, and comic and genre movies and TV shows. Some were good, and others were, well, not.

So Amanda and I, along with longtime Crisis On Infinite Midlives contributors Trebuchet and Pixiestyx, decided to throw a little awards ceremony, to celebrate 2014’s very best and very worst of the genre we love so much. And it is truly the finest and classiest awards ceremony that one can produce with a budget of $15 for stock sound effects and a free virtual disc jockey’s cart deck!

In this episode, we award (or at least argue about):

• Best and Worst Comic Book or Genre Movie,
• Best and Worst Comic Book or Genre TV show,
• Best and Worst Single Comic Issue,
• Best and Worst Comic Event or Crossover,
• Best and Worst Story Arc or Graphic Novel,
• Biggest Comeback and Worst Decline, and:
• Most Anticipated and Most Dreaded Geek Events in 2015!

And, as always, the disclaimers:

• This show is recorded live to tape. While this might mean a looser comics podcast that you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like and award for “The Carlie:” the member of The Walking Dead ensemble most likely to wander off alone to be menaced by zombies for no good reason.
• This show contains spoilers. Like the winner of The Carlie.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and therefore is not safe for work. Unless you want your employer to learn about the erotic benefits of instant vengeance, consider getting some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:56:49 — 107.2MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 47: I Shall Become A Fruit Bat

It’s the week before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring… including anyone who might generate much in the way of comics news.

However! DC sneaked a bunch of cancellations into their March solicitations, including a few books that have been around since the start of the New 52. And since it is a slow news week, and since March is the last month before the Convergence event brings all of DC’s eras into the spotlight, and since we are comic geeks who like to speculate, we take the opportunity to review the cancellations and talk about what DC might have in mind post-Convergence.

And since Christmas is right around the corner, we take the opportunity to reminisce about the geek and genre-related toys that we were given as children back in the 70s and the 80s. We hit some of the biggies, like Maskatron, the Millennium Falcon playset, Energized Spider-Man, Magnetic Batman and Robin… and in Amanda’s case, everything a child might need for a life on the Hobo Trail.

And finally, we discuss:

• Justice League #37, written by Geoff Johns with art by Jason Fabok, and:
• Batman #37, written by Scott Snyder with art by Greg Capullo!

And the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape. While that mean a looser show than you are used to from other comics podcasts, it also means that anything can happen. Like an unexpected reminiscence about a shattered childhood.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout a warning ahead of time, proceed with caution.
• This show contains adult, explicit language, and is therefore not safe for work. However, there’s every chance you’re on vacation for Christmas this week, and if not, maybe Santa will bring you a new set of headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:58:19 — 107.2MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Oh, and here’s that sweet, sweet Rob Liefeld jeans ad from the early 90s:

Episode 46: Tickle-Me-Princess Elsa

Even though a big night out last night turned us into shattered wrecks only resembling human beings, we still had a lot to talk about this episode… starting with Marvel’s Star Wars #1, which reportedly will be selling more than 1,000,000 copies… even though Dark Horse’s very similar 2013-2014 Star Wars comic never sold even 50,000 copies in a month. So we try to figure out just where all these comic books are going. You know, besides the quarter bin.

We also talk about the information gleaned from the Sony Pictures leak that Sony has been in talks with Marvel Studios about bring Spider-Man into the Marvel Cinematic Universe. We discuss where Marvel might fit Spidey in quickly, where he just wouldn’t work, what storylines they might use in a standalone Spider-Man movie, and who should play him (hint: with the Russo Brothers from Community possibly directing Avengers: Infinity War, it can only be… Chevy Chase! Wait, what?).

We also review:

• Bitch Planet #1, written by Kelly Sue DeConnick with art by Valentine DeLandro, and:
• Afterlife With Archie #7, written by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa with art by Francesco Francavilla!

And, as usual, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like a discussion about the fine line between a Disney toy and a marital aid.
• We use a lot of spoilers in this show. While we try to shout out a heads-up ahead of time, consider yourself warned.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Unless you want to explain to your employers who Sgt. Douchenozzle is, get yourself some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:39:34 — 92.1MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!