Human / Cyborg Relations: Paul Bettany Cast As Vision In Avengers: Age of Ultron

Not gonna lie to you, we have a busy day today: I need to run a few errands before heading to the day job, and this evening will be spent preparing and drilling for our multi-pronged assault on the Internet to navigate the San Diego Comic-Con preregistration process tomorrow morning – there are multiple locations, redundant IP addresses, and multi-faceted communications involved, because we don’t like to screw around – so I don’t have a lot of time today, but I did see this one little tidbit that I wanted to share.

Apparently Paul Bettany, who is the dude who does the voice of JARVIS in the Avengers and Iron Man movies, has been cast as an actual walking, talking, physical presence in Avengers: Age of Ultron.

Notice I didn’t say he was cast as a person. Because he hasn’t. He’s been cast as The Vision.

Actually, wait – I didn’t mean to imply that an android can’t be a person. I don’t want to be offensive to robosexuals. If “robosexuals” is, in fact, what you want to be called; this isn’t addressed in the Associated Press Style Guide. I’m sure your love for the RealDoll is as pure and innocent as the driven snow. Or as filthy and kinky as between any two perverted humans. I don’t want to offend anybody. I’m just trying to talk about Paul Bettany as The Vision.

So yeah, let me do that.

So this casting tels us a little bit about how the story of Avengers: Age of Ultron is probably gonna go. In the comics, after Hank Pym creates Ultron and he goes all whacky (The Vision, not Hank. Hank goes whacky way later), Ultron creates The Vision to infiltrate The Avengers and betray them. Now, we have heard that Pym, despite Michael Douglas’s casting as that characer in the Ant-Man movie, will not be a part of Age of Ultron, and the speculation has been that Ultron will be a result of something Tony Stark does. This casting seems to seal that notion, as having the voice of JARVIS, an already-existing artificial intelligence, become The Vision implies (or at least it makes me infer) that Ultron will do something tricky to JARVIS and plug his intelligence into an android body… and one that, at least temporarily, has a mad-on toward Stark and The Avengers. Which I can understand, since if I were forced to mutely witness Tony Stark bang supermodels in strange ways via unblinking security camera eyes night after night for a decade, I’d be in a strangling mood, too.

Plus, since in the comics, The Vision was married to The Scarlet Witch, it means we can totally see him bone Elizabeth Olsen, too.

Er, I mean, plug into her female connector. Or jack into her universal serial bus. Seriously, I’ll call it whatever you want…

(via Newsarama)